The mandate of a human male can be summed up as follows:
1. Achieve orgasm inside a wet orifice
2. Be better than others around you at as many things as you possible can, and display this as discretely (to avoid conflict), yet openly (for the bliss of your self-aggrandizement) as possible.
3. Raise your children so that they can be better than other children in as many things as they possibly can, and so others can look and know that they are *your* children.
4. Strive to be worshipped, and ultimately, to be honored and revered by many people at your grave.
5. Try to coerce yourself into a feeling of forced humility when it serves the other four purposes, then forget your humility again when it is convenient for your self-aggrandizement
6. Ask forgiveness when convenient.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
P.S. The list for women is much more offensive, and I tastefully decline to post it.
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